This is NOT funny

My new baby is going to be a Capricorn (OK, better had, anyway). Today's horoscope in the SF Chron:

Don't put up the "for sale sign before you're ready. You get one chance, so don't cave in to impatience. Continue to whet appetites.

Then mine begins: "Looking to someone else to make a decision keeps you hanging."

It's just not FAIR!